Saturday, December 11, 2010

Label-less

I've been reading these blogs and there always seems to be these labels for the types of moms. There are the organic moms, the frugal moms, the worrier moms, the green moms, the attached parenting moms, the babywise moms, etc etc. I feel like I should be a "type" but I'm not. I have no idea where I fit in the mommysphere. And sometimes that makes me feel guilty. Like I'm a bad mom or something because I don't have a label. I don't use cloth diapers (although I wouldn't mind using them but hubby really doesn't want to have to deal with them and feels like I would feel overwhelmed with the laundry - and he's right) but I will make my own baby food. Except for the cereal, that seems like too much effort. I think natural births are pretty fantastic but I had an epidural and feel absolutely no guilt about that. I definately don't use the attachment parenting style, but I'm all for baby-wearing (although unfortunately Z isn't as fond of babywearing as I am). Z didn't spend a single night in our room (with the exception of any time we were staying the night elsewhere) and the first time he slept through the night, I didn't wake up in the middle of the night to check to see if he was breathing. I don't believe in "on-demand" nursing and I pretty much count the days until I can wean Z from breastfeeding. I do enjoy the closeness of nursing him but I hate the fact that I can never be away from him for more than 3 hours because it takes me FOREVER to get a bottle. It also drives me crazy that I can't tell if he's taken a full meal or if he's just snacked a little. I don't like the CIO method all that much because it breaks my heart to hear him cry but I do do it occasionally, especially for the late afternoon nap because that seems to be the hardest for him to take. I guess I just feel sometimes that I don't have a parenting style and will that mess up Z? Should I pick a style and commit to it? I do love Babywise because I think the concept of eat, play, sleep is a great idea and I think the notion that babies cry for reasons other than hunger is important, especially when there is the temptation to just shove your breast in their mouth to get them to stop crying. Personally, I have NO idea if he's crying because he's hungry or not so most of the time, going by the clock works. We're pretty flexible. If he's obviously hungry or to be honest, going insane and I can't calm him down, then of course I'll feed him regardless of when he last ate but really it works for us to use a routine. But the other points in Babywise? I don't follow them, they're pretty strict and I think babies need some flexibility in their schedule. And they only work if your baby works on a perfect schedule, I was driving myself crazy expecting Z to do things exactly as the books says.
But in the long run, I think that part of motherhood is figuring out what works for you. Every baby is different. So as much as I kinda wish I could fit into this perfect label, I don't think we're meant to. As long as I love my son, I think it's okay. Hubby & I have two really important tasks as parents - love our child and teach him about Christ's love. And I strive to do that every single day. And really how can you not love this face:

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